Sassenachs in mah Loch

[Wee Angus McWordy]

Did ye shee rray English Doon ra Watter?
Did ye shee rra wee fishies shhcatter?
Fine well rray know whit rray are afteher
Wi' their Jeely jaurs an' their nets in their haun'
Ah..rra day rrey had in Sshcotland
Have sshume tea wi' yer bread and butter
A' rra drunk men lyin in rra gutter...
Rrey wur up at Loch Ness furr rra day...

Says Tam tae me...
Ish rrat a kilt or a dress?
Sshaysh ah tae him
Its a kilt shhun, no a dress!
Ah'm fur ra next train intae Inverness
Cos I don't like English
Anyway...

Ah' English, goodbye
Ah hate rra shmell o' yer rotten crumpetshh
Neffer again shall I shee yoooo
Ah English...GOODBYE

[Daphne]

I fear you're getting more and more obscure, Wee Angus. This is bizarre - how many whiskies did you have on board when you penned this?

[sadlonelyguy]

I guess I don't know what to say here cos I don't get all of it. I'd love to go to Scotland one day but I'll take my Scotch dictionary, thats for sure!

[alex]

Even though I couldn't understand a word of it, it made me laugh out loud!

Well done !

[Daphne]

It helps if you read it out loud in your best "Taggart" accent.