The Ballad of Fraser Allonby Q.C.

[Fraser Allonby Q.C.]

Each and every morn I wake
And rouse myself from sleep.
I stretch and yawn, and stretch again,
Then out of bed I leap.

Into my pantaloons I strap
My heaving, sweaty frame.
I'm Fraser Allonby Q.C.:
Well knows the world my name.

My larder groans with sweet delights
With which I'll break my fast.
I gorge on buns and pies and ale
And relish my repast.

I stroll into my robing room
Wherein forthwith I dress
My bulk in courtly finery:
I wear only the best.

I place upon my head so large
My newly powdered wig,
And hide within black folds of gown
My hindquarters so big.

I prance into the morn so fair
And heave my bulk to court
Wherein I speak of equity,
And negligence, and tort.

My clients pay me by the hour
And augment my vast riches.
I spend my wealth on whores and port
And jewel-encrusted britches.

All the comments that I make
Are more or less the same
I'm Fraser Allonby Q.C.:
Well knows the world my name.

[Daphne]

A delightful poem. The first posting by a new member on my new website! God bless you and all who sleep with you.

[Wee Angus McWordy]

No' a bad wee poem, Fraser! It's guid tae see ye've goat a guid Scottish name on ye!

[annettecurtain]

Never heard of yer. Please elaborate.

[Fraser Allonby Q.C.]

My fame is spreading. Like my waistline, some have said.

[alex]

Exaltations for this fine poem, Sir Allonby. I'm sorry I missed it and will be adding it to my favourites forthwith.

Your larder sounds very tasty indeed!

[alex]

I can't find a 'favourites' thingy.

What a crap site this is !!

[alex]

Sir Allonby... please take a peek at my own fine poetry. I would be grateful for your comments.

Thank you, kind sir.